Vampiric Sexpots… you can’t handle all the lushness I have cause its so fanaglicious!
Posted by Ms Harker | Filed under Horror Films, Horror TV
A post was released the other day on one of my favourite sites to trawl Fearnet, claiming to have a list of the, in their opinion the Top 10 Sexiest Vampires . Now being one who delights in all things vamp I eagerly scrolled down the page and felt the darkness inside me turn from black to a lava like red with the travesty that was their top ten. Now every tragedy has its blood red lining True Blood’s Eric Northman every woman’s wicked viking vampiric sexpot had made the list, as had the sultry sanguine seductress Salma Hayek as Santanico Pandemonium in From Dusk Til Dawn.
However my issues with the list are twofold. Firstly they don’t appear to have gone beyond the nineties, with the exception of The Hunger, which is a sign of it being written by a youngling to the fold of darkness, or laziness. Two; how on earth can the ferret brothers especially Stefan from ‘The Vampire Diaries’ get a look in? I will concede Damon has a nice touch of the Rob Lowe about him (meow!) however that is all I will concede. Needless to say I have developed my own list of fangtastic seductive vampire’s who will get into a girls frilly panties or convince a guy he can cluck like a chicken with the wink of an eye or the wiggle of their hips (in no particular order):
Gloria Holden, Countess Marya Zaleska: Dracula’s Daughter
The statuesque beauty exudes sex appeal as the daughter of the most famous vampyre of all. Gliding gracefully across each scene and dressed in stunning art deco gowns with plunging necklines.
Kiefer Sutherland, David: The Lost Boys
We all love a bad boy, even more so a leader of the pack, in this case a kiss of renegade vampires. Kiefer plays the ultimate brat pack vamp leading his boys to terrorize and recruit. Michael got all the press but we fangbangers know who brought the heat to this tale of the undead.
Antonio Banderas, Armand: Interview with the Vampire
The brooding Armand in his black suit and cape, sexual ambiguity and eyes you could drown in trumped both Cruise and Pitt in Interview with the Vampire. Who would go for the whining Louis or sadistic Lestat when you have a hot latin (well maybe warm, being a vampire and all) leader of the Paris vampiric kiss?
Alexander Skarsgard, Eric Northman: True Blood
As above with Keifer, bad boys are much more fun. Especially when they’re tall, brooding well sculpted and wear a suit like its a second skin. Eric brings the raunch to True Blood with his unabashed ownership of being a vampire and the appetites that come along with it. Who in history can call children ‘Teacup humans’ ans still sound sexy? Meow!
Salma Hayek, Santanico Pandemodium: From Dusk Til Dawn
Santanico leader of the kiss that resides at the ‘Titty Twister’ (I love the neon sign out the front of the bar!). This vampiric temptress has curves in all the right places an knows how to use them. This undead seductress can also wrangle a snake like no one else… take from that what you will.
Mary and Madeleine Collinson, Maria and Frieda: Twins of Evil
The saying goes that two is always better than one. This goes double for this sensual pair of twins. These two ladies vamped it up at the Hammer studio in the film ‘Twins of Evil’. Raven haired vixens, innocent features, with bodies to kill. The ladies were unfortunately not so much known for their acting abilities but for their voluptuous figures, were later to appear on the pages of Playboy. (Reference, Hammer Glamour, p40)
Marie Devereux: The Brides of Dracula
This star from The Brides of Dracula was known for her ’sizzling dark beauty, cascading raven tresses and devastating physique’. Another stunner from the Hammer Studio, she steams up the screen as one of Dracula’s leading ladies. classic beauty that speaks for itself in the sex appeal stakes. (Reference, Hammer Glamour, p59)
Gary Oldman, Dracula: Bram Stokers Dracula
Some may see this as an odd choice. However sex appeal does not always come from film star looks or devastating curves. Oldman’s portrayal of Dracula was one of a tortured soul pining for a lost love who he had searched for through the ages. He played the Count as a romantic, once landing in London a cultured gentleman. The ultimate scene where he is in bed with Mina and she is feeding from his chest is one of triumph and sadness all wrapped up in eroticism, which is why Oldman well deserves his place on this list.
Stephen Dorff, Deacon Frost: Blade
I am going to admit personal bias on this one, however he does fall into the ategory of the bad boy you just can’t say no to in his portrayal of the rebellious and ambitious Deacon Frost. His boyish good looks and brooding eyes, combine well with the characters lethal nature to create the vamp you love to hate, but makes you weak at the knees with a flick of his tussled locks!
Gianna Jun, Saya: Blood the Last Vampire
Last but not least, Saya. Not your typical pick for one with sex appeal, this pint sized assassin has a fair bit of competition in her film for the crown of seductress which her nemesis would be more likely to win. However, who can resist a gorgeous Japanese chick in a school girls outfit, lads you know what I’m talking about…
So there you have it Ms Harker’s list of Fantastic Seductive Vampires, it is by no means exhaustive, however is guaranteed to give you a serious case of Vampire Moistness Disorder.
Ms Harker.
Tags: Horror, Horror Flms, Horror TV, Vampire
3 Responses to “Vampiric Sexpots… you can’t handle all the lushness I have cause its so fanaglicious!”
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Cortez the Killer Says:
October 11th, 2009 at 1:41 amHands down, Gloria Holden is the sexiest. Everytime she’s on the screen she’s absolutely mesmerizing. Just the way that she carries herself, its truly incredible watching her. Great list!
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Ms Harker Says:
October 11th, 2009 at 1:48 pmAbsolutely Cortez, class, sophistication and sensuality.
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Brittany Says:
January 29th, 2010 at 9:30 amI THINK Salma Heyek is the HOTTEST girl OMG.
